I Miss Life Before…

Lately, I’ve been so overwhelmed with the thought of how every event I go to, everyone is busy capturing moments than living them.

And why? Only to go post them on social media.

I personally have no Instagram, Twitter, Snap Chat,.. I do not know what else is out there really. I just cannot begin to imagine the time wasted uploading, following and commenting. Even if I would only have an account to inspire, it is just too time consuming!

I am guilty of having a Facebook account however, which for me is mainly to keep contact with all the many I met growing up abroad as “third culture kid” and that is via messages. Secondly, I use my profile as a mean to express some of my endless thoughts in hopes of inspiring others.. giving you food for thought, help you self-reflect and use your own minds. I am constantly updating my thoughts in statuses. Lastly, I do follow some motivating spiritual pages and athletes that I do like to check out from time to time for inspiration. Other than that, I am inactive.

Sometimes when I do sign in and that damn newsfeed throws it all on my screen. If somethings catches my eyes, being a curious human like everyone else, I check it out.. and I am always shocked;

At how the silliest and most empty minded of comments get the most of likes and debates.

At how people are taking private wedding photo-shoots and videos only to post them online to the public with zero privacy (actually most of them look like fake acts anyways but still). Many of which do it even during the honeymoon! It is as though the purpose to their union has become approval and applaud from the public.

At how I have witnessed people that dress up and go out just to take photos to post and in that instant.

At how some people need to tell thousands who could not care less about their every move.

At how people are only to out to portray themselves as picture perfect when it is all edited filters and masks on uploaded! Everyone acts like they got it all together on social media. Then the envy rises from others of course thinking what is posted is  real. I believe nothing real is perfect.

At how a mother can upload her newborn’s every move in pictures and statuses, what happened to just being a focused mother and doing your job without the publicity?

At how young children’s parents make them Facebook profiles when they can barely say a correct full sentence.

At how lies are portrayed as truths. It is much easier to be anyone and do anything behind a keyboard, after all.

At how family post picture portraits when at home they are at ruins and do not even talk- all they care for is what others see and “like” and shower with empty compliments.

Finally, let us not forget the families born in the early 70s and 80s that are joining Facebook late and totally misusing it as well. I guess everyone today freaked out when their parent joined.

This is the case when it comes to social media and Facebook in particular. In this topic I have to say; honestly, I will never be the woman that displays her personal life for likes, congrats, and validations on my beauty or my partners or one day kid(s)!

I will not make confession statuses to family and people I value when they are right beside me! I will be busy loving them in words and actions in person.

I believe the best of relationships/marriages are those that are kept PRIVATE. That is true intimacy right there. You know what you have and you keep it between you two, not even sharing your troubles with your families should be accepted when you are two grown adults.

Also, know that when you find yourself eager to know information on the personal matters (relationships) of others then you probably need urgent help in your own!

When you are really busy living and loving, and happily.. you have no time to post pictures and updates of details in your lives! When you have found the woman/man of your dreams, you will not be busy telling the acquaintances and seeking their congrats and compliments. No judgment though, I wish you all the best. Just saying this Facebook exhibitionism never was or will be me. If I must share anything it will be my words that are my hope to change this world one person at a time. And even then I do not care for how many “likes” and “shares” I get. See my aim in this life was never the attention, I do not need others to rate the worth of anything in my life or get involved even if simply through observing- this is why I stay way from people that over-share.

As for my life, personally, you will never know my successes, who I love, am with, or marry. My family and best friends would.. and they do not need Facebook to expose it.

Now when it comes to technology. I have a love hate relationship with it!

I was born 1990. And honestly, I miss how simple life was then. Even then I used to say, “Gosh wish I was alive in the time were they barely had radios and still sent letters.”

The times when, when someone cared he would sail oceans and come right to your door. You know when love and care where actually shown in presence and not at your fingertips when you press on a button. When the person was present they were fully in mind, heart, and soul- and not somewhere else starring at a screen.

When someone would feel, and think for her/himself and express instead of copy paste and forward messages.

When people were busy being outside and noticing those around them; instead of at home texting or even if outside they are staring at a tiny screen clueless to their surroundings.

When private photos remained between family and friends in the pictures only, or at least, close loved ones to us and not mere acquaintances.

When fun was actually taking part in activities and events, and not merely recording them!

When children did not cry to grab their father’s or mother’s phone’s “to play” and instead would grab their hands and take them to play grounds!

When you walked away instead of sat there texting when you were next to people you could not stand.

When your only option was to be present in this life that is happening in reality and not distractions in an app and screen.

When you didn’t care about acquaintances and those who had in on your life were the ones actually present in it!

When what is personal and private between two stayed in their own homes.

When people did not know the whereabouts of those that do not concern them.

When we did things mindfully; like ate without multitasking, drove without texting, walked without checking their email…

When no one had constant interruptions like notifications, beeps, and alerts throughout her/his days!

I think it is vital we switch it all off and reconnect with ourselves, others, nature, and life in person. It will help you stop comparing too and rediscover your truth and inner light.

I personally take breaks from technology and social media. I decide to shut off my smart phone for a few days and I do just that. I would only on it to tell family and loved ones I am okay if necessary. I also deactivate my account for a few months per year, just because it’s spiritually nourishing and I accomplish much more. It is like detoxing your spirit basically.

Lately, I have decided no internet or social media starting 8pm every night till 1pm next day. It is a challenge but I am getting there step by step. Every morning I need to make sure I have done my rituals, exercised, and was productive, only then am I allowed to waste time on a screen after I’ve accomplished what matters. At night I find it is best to unwind, zone out, and meditate. I do not check any messages. I do not read anything off a screen. I either read a book, write in my dairy, listen to calming music, mediate, do more yoga, pray, or draw on my sketch book.

I think one must learn to be stronger than their electronic addictions. Our lives are entirely technology driven, and that can have a positive impact, or the total opposite.

It is important to connect with your real life human network instead of social networks! To reach out and lend a hand instead of be a robot behind a screen.

I do not think social media is a pure evil, like all else, only when we use it for wrong purposes and abuse it. It is also important you designate a time for it and not allow yourself for be lost in everyone’s nonsense throughout your day. You are always the one in charge.

But think of the fact how technology and the internet can let you reach masses worldwide and remember to put this power to use; to inform, express, create, and inspire others to the better.

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